For mothers, childbirth is just the start of painful contractions. That’s because they’re under the constant scrutiny of mom-shaming.
Nowadays, it is common for people to shame everything from the lunches children take to school to a child’s weight. Dr. Jillian Roberts, a child psychologist and associate professor of educational psychology at the University of Victoria, told Global that while people’s criticism can be well-intentioned, it can also be rooted in wanting to feel superior by making others feel like less.
By criticizing someone else, we stack higher on the scale in comparison.
Dr. Jillian Roberts
One mom set the record straight
After hearing her fair share of flack, Karen Johnson, a proud stay-at-home and blogger had had enough. “We already beat ourselves up and then to have people make us feel bad on top of that, it’s just not OK,” she told Global.
Karen then decided to take the matter to Facebook. Posting a picture of herself holding up Popsicles, which she describes as the “cheap kind that are 50 for $2.00,” she discussed different methods moms use to raise their kids.
I’m involved with my kids’ school but I don’t volunteer and live there every day. Are the moms who volunteer daily any better than those who never do? No. Am I incredibly grateful for the moms who volunteer every day and help the teachers? YES.
Going over every opposing approach – from beer to breastfeeding – Johnson concludes that all moms are awesome.
She ended her post with a wish.
So how about this? Can we all climb down off judgmental mountain for a second? And just support one another? And just say, Hey, motherhood is hard. You’re doing a good job. Raising kids can knock the wind out of a person. You got this.
– Karen Johnson
“I thought this was something that we all needed to hear,” she said of her post.
Other mothers chimed in
Her message sure landed, receiving over 680,000 likes and more than 430,000 shares over just a few days. Many moms chimed in with an amen.
“Truth in every word and I’m tickled you had the guts to put it out there. Seems to me like you’re a wonderful mother,” one user said.
“My house has random freezee pop wrappers all over the place. My kids clearly do not know where the garbage is….I’m still a good mom,” commented another.
Of course, some tossed stones through their glasshouse.
“Maybe you should clean your house instead of exercising. I think it’s more important to have a clean and sanitized home for the health of your family,” one person commented.
Moms need love too
To that commenter and everyone else, Johnson has a simple message: We’re all doing our best.
People get stuck on this idea that you’re doing something wrong because you’re doing it differently from them. I wish we could get past that. We’re all working so hard to do a good job.
– Karen Johnson
Let’s treat mothers like the valuable community of life-givers, nurturers, and teachers they are. If ever we see something questionable, let’s show the same patience, love, and understanding we would to our children.
After all, none of us are perfect.
More uplifting news:
There’s no perfect way to parent
Don’t shame others for trying their best.